Soulmates by Kahlil Gibran


 I shall live beyond death, and I shall sing in your ears
Even after the ‘vast sea-wave carries me back
to the vast sea-depth .
I shall sit at your board though without a body,
and I shall go with “you to Your fields, a spirit invisible.
I shall come to ‘You at your fireside, a guest unseen.
Death changes nothing but the mask that covers our faces.
The woodsman shall be still a woodsman,
The ploughman, a ploughman,
and he who sang his song to the wind
shall sing it also to the moving spheres.  

..Kahlil Gibran

Healing Grief – Reclaiming Life After Any Loss

Sometimes we need to find our own source in to manage our grief. If you ardent reader then there are many good books which help you to understand our life better and at the same time  ti could help you to cope up with the pain. Books in a way and until today are my companion.  

One of the books  which might be of help is ‘Healing Grief -Reclaiming Life After Any Loss’, published in 2001. The author of the book is James Van Praagh who is well known medium.

James Van Praagh, as a medium  has been linking the communication between the loved ones  living on earth and the ones living in the spiritual realm. It is claimed that he has helped to change millions of lives who have lost their loved ones. Although not everyone would have met him personally for a reading, his books along with the books written by many others have definitely helped many people around the world.

In this book James shares many insightful spiritual messages from the loved ones on the other side, along with his own personal accounts. He assists us to be aware that everything which happens to us is for the evolvement of our soul,  along its  journey.

James also introduces some therapeutic remedies by giving healing guidelines not only for those who have lost  their loved ones,  but also for those who have ended up with divorce, loss of pets as well as other types of losses.

In the last chapter, he has 38  interesting questions and answers session. It could  be useful for us to understand what could be  the life on the other side. He also says that  the only ‘religion’ on the other side is  love. I believe as love exists in every religion it will continue to do so more meaningfully on the other side.

He concluded the book by saying that this book will not bring about a quick fix to your on-going grief but it could  bring comfort and assist one in resolving some of the various questions or conditions of one’s daily life. He says how we react to a particular situation is important which could either hinder or assist us to handle the situation.

Anyone can help a person who is grieving

When my son Prashanth moved on to the next realm I was wondering why some people stayed away from me.  Some of my close friends and relatives who were in continuous touch with me  suddenly put a halt to all communication, including e-mails. I assumed email would be the best tool for someone to communicate with me or probably at least a text message. But very few did it.

What I heard from others was that they do not know what to say  or how to console me. Some even said that they do not want to trouble me. I was then asking myself  whether I was abnormal in craving to talk about my son to someone everyday, which I do to this day. But it was a natural feeling I had. I then assumed probably I am one of the few exceptional case. Everyday, and more often on weekends my eyes will keep turning to my home entrance, hoping someone close to me will pop in. Of course although there were some closed  ones who visited us, there were many who never turned up until today. In some cases I have  met up with some friends accidentally and I do even asked them whether they knew what happened to my family. Normally they nod their head acknowledging or  say “Yes”. So, I realised that sometimes there are blocks within us which hinder us from communicating with people who have lost their loved ones.

I  realised I could only talk about my son most of the time with my own wife . Occasionllly I do the same  with very close relatives  and friends  of mine.  At the same time I even start talking about my son to people whom I meet for the first time. I feel very desperate if I don’t talk about my son.  So much so I even talked to those whom I had to interview for a job.  Some even listened very intensively. Fortunately they did not walk a way. Otherwise, it would have been not only embarrassing but painful as well.

Am I crazy talking about my son regularly? l realised I am not. As  I was reading many books I realised that I am not alone who is seeking for ‘listeners’. Many of those who have lost their loved ones feel the same.  They say almost the same things.

In one of the books ‘I’m still with you’ written by the spiritual medium Carole she touched on this subject. Below is an extract from the book.

“If you are the one who is giving comfort to others who are grieving, take action and offer to do something for them that will help in day-to day living. Preparation of a meal, tending to a garden, running errands or cleaning house are chores that often get neglected when people are grieving. Many people simply need someone to listen to them talk about a departed loved one, which helps release the pain of loss. Don’t ever say, “If you need anything, call me,” because most people in grief will never pick up the phone to do so. You must be the one to reach out. Your time and talents will help to ease someone’s passage in ways you may not even imagine.”

In fact, after reading this I realised that  while going through missing my son I too can be of help to someone who is grieving. I wish more people will do the same.  Grievers need help and especially to those one who are close with. Who else can do it if we do not?


Our loved ones from the other side

We hear people saying that our loved ones who have parted us continue to keep in touch with us, all the time. It is we who are not seem to be aware. However, sometimes they might show us in strange ways that might  make sense of their presence. Recently I read  a book ‘Do Dead People Watch You Shower’ written by Concetta Bertoldi, a full-time famous medium  and who consults regularly with members of Britain’s  royal family, American celebrities, politicians and others.

Do not feel odd by just looking at the title of the book. The title just refers to one of the questions of more  than 100 questions in this book. I found this book to be useful as I see that she is honest about what she  knows and what she does not know.  In this book she has stated that there could not be coincidences if some strange things happen, after someone in our family  crosses over to the other side. She believes that our loved ones assist us in some ways which also become the validation of their existence. Below is one of the questions which she has highlighted and related it to an experience (in own words) she had with one of her clients.

Is there another word that you prefer to coincidence? 

Well, rather than “coincidences.’ I think of them as validations because they validate the near-perfection of the Other Side. I’ve heard so many stories of things coming together in ways that seem really impossible with our limited way of understanding.

 I did a reading for a woman and the person who came through was her sister. Her sister was showing me a ring and she was say 19 to tell my client, “with all my love,” which is something that happens frequently’ –  I’ll be shown an object that has meaning between the client and the individual who has passed on and is communicating from the Other Side. My client acknowledged that she knew what the ring meant and I continued with the reading.  I didn’t stop and ask her what the ring meant – l didn’t want to know. I try not to let people tell me things while I’m doing the reading because I don’t want to lose the thread of what is going on with the communication, and I also don’t want information that may color what I’m hearing from the Other Side. So I only asked her, “Do you know what ring she is talking about?” and my client said, yes, she did.

 Afterward, though, she said to me, “Concetta, I want to tell you a story

When her sister died, my client had wanted to have some keepsake of hers and what she chose was a ring that her sister had worn. The ring was not very valuable, but it was precious to her because of its significance, so she didn’t want to wear it and possibly lose it. She kept it in a jewelry box. One day, she’s looking in the box and notices that the ring isn’t there. She gets very upset, doesn’t know where the ring could have gone. She mentions to her family that the ring is missing, and her teenage daughter sadly confesses that she took the ring. Unfortunately, she wore it when she went out with friends and somewhere along the way she lost it. She had no idea where – they’d been to the movies, the mall, McDonald’s. It could have been lost anywhere, and frankly, losing it in any of those places, they knew they’ cl never see the ring again.

 A year and a half goes by. One day my client’s son comes home from seeing a movie with his friends. He says, Mom, look what I found.” He shows her a ring. It’s her sister’s ring: She said, “Where on earth did you find it’ He said, “I bought some popcorn, and when I got to the bottom of the bag, there it was. What an amazing thing! Some would say, ’What a coincidence.”

 Now, as I’ve said, in my worldview there is no such thing as a coincidence. You can say whatever you want about how the ring got into the popcorn. You can make up a whole logical story: The daughter loses the ring in the theatre. Maybe somebody has the job of cleaning up and he finds the ring. He thinks, Oh, it’s a girl’s ring. I’ll just give it to so-and-so,” a co-worker. So maybe this girl now wears the ring and one night she’s working the popcorn machine and as she scoops out popcorn, the ring falls into the bag without her noticing it. The customer who bought the –popcorn finds the ring. It just happens to be the son of the woman to whom the ring belonged.

 it could happen that way I sure, But I don’t think you could even calculate the odds of the customer buying the popcorn and finding the ring being the brother of the girl who lost the ring a year and a half earlier. In my world, the only possible way this could happen is with some help from the one to whom this outcome is most important – my client’s sister on the Other Side.

Kyle’s birthday Wishes….

Different people have different experiences when their loved ones from the other side show signs, indicating they are around us. Sometimes it seems it is unbelievable but as for those who had similar experiences or for those the experiences may depict  some indepth meaning, known only to them, are convinced that there is no such things called death.

In the book “Quit Kissing My Ashes”Judy Coller, the mother whose son Kyle  from  the other side gave her many signs, convincing her enough, to show her  he is around her. Below is an extract of an experience she had.

Kyle’s presence was unmistakable another day, on October 12th, the day before my first birthday without Kyle. I was not looking forward to the next day when I would become fifty-five years old. It was one of those days that everyone said I  would dread, one of those days we are to “celebrate”. Like most things in Life, it’s the anticipation of the event that is so highly profiled. It’s not the day itself, which is usually a let down.

It was around 5.30 in the morning. I was in the bathroom, the one he used it exclusively when was at home. I was putting some make-up on in order to go to few garage sales.

I didn’t really feel like going, but I was getting ready anyhow. I felt emotional when all of a sudden, the eight lights on the mirror began going off and on. It wasn’t just a flicker. They went completely off and the turned on again, as if someone were actually turning the switch off and on.  This kept on and on. I yelled to Jim (her husband) who was in the kitchen reading the paper. I told him to hurry.

As Jim slowly walked down the dark hallway, he could see the lights going off and on. When he walked into the bathroom, he flipped the switch.

I asked, “Why did you do that?”

“I don’t want Kyle to burn down the house,”he said.
Kyle might have been doing fifty-five times for my birthday. It actually lasted that many times.

When I got home from looking for bargains, there was a message on my answering machine. Jim wanted me to call him at work as soon as I got the message. When  I called him,  he told me when got  out of his shower and began drying off, the eight lights above his mirror began dong the same thing, going off and on.

You have to understand these two bathrooms are in circuit  and none of the light bulbs were bad. They all were still working over  a year later. It had been four years since were remodelled and installed these lights, and it had never happened before. Believe it or not, Kyle’s blinking the lights to let me know he was celebrating with me was the best birthday present I ever received.

(There are other incidences and experiences Judy Collier and her family has experienced. You have to read the book to know and understand these signs. Only those who have separated physically from someone they dearly love will believe in such experiences and of course I am one of them).

Past Life Memory

Are we born more than once  in this earth? In fact there are claims that we are born many times and that in some cases past life memories do exist.

Sometimes when a child screams or cry we might not understand why. There are times the parents rush their children to the clinic when they start screaming or crying uncontrollably, for no apparent reason. A child might even stop crying all of a sudden in the same way it started  even before the doctor attend to the child. Well, of course the doctor might also not able to ‘diagnose’ the cause or identify the problem since it could be beyond our human reasoning or understanding.

Below is case extracted from the book “Children’s Past Lives” by Carol Bowman. She relates a verified story of how Past live memories affects a child.

The Story of  Nicola’s Catharsis

One story in particular sparked me the most. Of an of the Harrisons’ great cases, the case of Nicola was the only one that described a catharsis and a healing.

On her second birthday Nicola was surprised with a gift from her parents, a little toy dog. She got very excited and told her mother the toy reminded her of her dog Muff, “the same as the other dog I had before.” Nicola’s mother, Kathleen, thought her daughter’s fantasy play was amusing but soon forgot it.  But in the days that followed, she noticed that Nicola had regular conversations with the toy dog, asking if he remembered the fun they had shared in the past. Kathleen noticed because Nicola’s persistence in this “fantasy” was most unusual.  

 One day Kathleen was taken completely off guard when Nicola asked her, in a gush, why she wasn’t a boy this time like she was before when Mrs. Benson was her mommy and she played with Muff. This time Kathleen encouraged Nicola to tell he tell her more. That was all Nicola needed for the story of her past life to pour out.

 She said her family had lived in a gray stone house that was in the “middle of four houses joined together in a row”  and next to railway tracks; her mother wore long skirts, the same Victorian style clothing her dolly wore now, and the town they lived in was Haworth; she and her dog roamed the fields around her house and her  “other Mummy” always warned her not to play near the railway tracks, but one day she was playing on the railway tracks when a tram “came up fast and knocked me over.”  Men took her to a hospital where “I went to sleep and died and I saw God in  Heaven before I was born. But I didn’t really die. I came to you instead and you got to be my other Mummy.”

This flood of detail couldn’t be ignored. Little Nicola’s story was so convincing that Kathleen took her to Haworth, a short drive away, to see if her daughter would recognize anything. Neither Nicola nor Kathleen had ever been to Haworth, but as soon as they got there, Nicola skipped down streets and unmarked lanes leading to the outskirts of town. She took her mother directly to the house she had described: one in the middle of four graystone townhouses. Everything matched Nicola’s  description perfectly, including the surrounding fields and the railway tracks.

Kathleen pursued her daughter’s past life memory. Since she had a name and an address as leads, she decided to check the records of the parish church to see if she could verify the accuracy of Nicola’s recollection. She opened the yellowed pages of the old census book and her heart “skipped a beat.” She found the “Benon family listed (an unusual name for that parish). They had one son, who was born in 1875. But the next census, taken six years later, listed the same Benson family with two young girls, aged three years and six months-but no son! Since the census required that each family member always be listed, Kathleen concluded that the little boy Nicola remembered must have died when he was between five and six years old.

Nicola’s was a remarkable case of spontaneous memory, with details that could be verified by her mother. But her story goes beyond mere recollection of derails.

One night, soon after their expedition to Haworth, Nicola’s family was sitting around the television watching a movie. On the screen appeared a train thundering down the tracks. Immediately Nicola went into hysterics. Threw herself down on the floor and thrashed about wildly, gasping for air. Kathleen ran to her, panicked, not knowing what had come over her little girl so suddenly. Nicola was inconsolable and started crying out repeatedly, “The train, the train!” Kathleen turned off the TV, and  Nicola immediately stopped screaming, but continued to cry. Cathleen understood in an instant that the sight of the train had reminded Nicola of her death when she was the Benson boy. And she understood that Nicola was reliving that terrifying death. Because Kathleen knew what was happening, she let Nicola cry it out in her arms, not denying her fear of the train. After a while Nicola calmed down and was fine.

Nicola was never afraid of trains again. By the age of live she had forgotten almost everything about her life as the Benson boy-with one exception. She never forgot her pet dog, Muff.

What had happened with little Nicola?  I was struck by what could be verified through historical records, Kathleen believed beyond a doubt that Nicola had lived before as the Benson boy and had been killed by a train. So when Nicola was re-experiencing her death on the living room floor, yelling hysterically about the train, Kathleen didn’t mistake her daughter’s fit for random hysteria. She knew without taking the time to think that it was a consequence of her daughter’s past life memory. She immediately saw the connection, knew it was true, and gave Nicola her loving support. She didn’t hamper the process with doubt. The memory ran its natural course, culminating in catharsis, giving Nicola a chance to finally vent the terror that had been trapped in her since the train ran her down so long ago. Then the memory faded and disappeared. 

Does the soul really know……

One of the latest book written by George Anderson with regard to after life is “Ask George Anderson”. In this book he replies to some of the most commonly asked questions asked by those who were seeking to know more about after life on the earth. Below on of the question and his reply.

Do the souls really know how much we love and miss them?  – Robin

In  more than forty years of working with the souls, the one thing I know for certain is that no matter what becomes of us on the earth, love is the most powerful and enduring of the emotions. Love has the power to extinguish hate, jealousy and fear, and lives on even when the physical body dies. Love is the only thing the souls bring with them to the hereafter,  so that they can shower those they love on the earth with all the love they have collected from each of us during their time on the earth. Love is more powerful than death.

The souls know how much they mean to us, and that they were loved beyond their limited understanding when they were on the earth. Now, in a world of total clarity, they can see straight into our hearts and understand, perhaps for the  first time, the depth of love we feel for those we cherish. The souls don’t feel the same pain of separation as we do, because they are able to be with us during those dark moments when we think we are all alone, and they have the ability to comfort our hearts, in order to help us find our hope and a reason to continue on in our journey here. But the souls also understand that part of our spiritual lesson on the earth is to endure the pain of a loved one’s passing, and they cannot take that pain away from us, for fear of taking away a large part of the reason why we are still here – to learn to love again and continue to find hope and peace while we suffer, the loss of a loved one. The souls want so much for us to complete the lessons that are to be among our greatest struggles  here, so that we may enter the hereafter when our work on the earth is done, and join the in a world of joy.

To the souls, it is only in the blink of an eye that they will see us again, but to us, it is day after day of working to earn the same love, joy, and peace that the souls now find in their new world. In the meantime, the souls have never left our side; they continue to walk with us, share our joy and pain, and continue helping us to help ourselves until we see them again. This is how powerful their love for us is: they spend the rest of our lives caring for us in ways we may never completely realize until we see them again and understand from their unique perspective. But no matter what time or distance separates us from those we love, we hold a piece of them in our hearts, and we hold an invisible thread that connects us to their love and hope. This is something the souls have promised each and every one of their loved ones on the earth-that they will never abandon us, because their love for us is as steadfast and enduring as the Infinite light itself. One fine day we will be able to see our loved ones again and return the love they gave us so freely as they helped us navigate the rest of our existence here. The souls’ love for us is like a beacon that will lead us right back to them when our work on the earth is done.  

‘The Flower People’ – Evidence of Past Life

Many things have been said about reincarnation. After some reading and from the evidences given (not proof) I too beginning to ponder whether some of the special talents  some of them poses in this life  are inherited from the previous lives. One of the best evidences of reincarnation could be referred in the book “Children Who Remember Previous Lives” by Ian Stevenson, M.D. It is said that children especially between the ages of two and five seem to remember their previous lives. Normally when they are above seven the memories are said to fade.

Carol Bowman who hold M.S. in counselling is also an author, therapist and has been studying on reincarnation. She has also authored the book ‘Return from Heaven’.  I found this book interesting. To know more about this book  you can refer to  the menu ‘Books’  – sub heading ‘Reincarnation’.

In another book ‘Children’s Past Lives’ – How Past Life Memories Affect Your Child,  Carol Bowman  shares her own and her children’s past life regression experiences under Norman (a Hypnotherapist) and that she eventually started carrying out past life regressions on her own. Below is one of the results of past life regression which she has carried out.


The Flower People

 Amanda Dickey, was eleven when I regressed her. She had particularly vivid recall of an Englishwoman by the name  Elizabeth C. (she couldn’t remember the last name) who, lived in London with her mother and brother in the mid-1800s. Elizabeth would often sit in a garden near her townhouse and talk to the “flower people,” little spirits who came out from behind the flowers and advised her whenever she had a problem in her life. Elizabeth wrote stories about these “flower people,” which were published in a London newspaper and became quite popular as a serial. She married and had a son. Widowed at an  early age, she and her son emigrated to America. She continued  to support herself with her writing until she died of a disease Amanda couldn’t identify. Her life was marred only by an irreconcilable quarrel she had with her brother.

 I was curious about Elizabeth. Was she someone we could trace? I asked Amanda if Elizabeth had published any books.  According to Amanda, her stories had only been serialized in newspapers. That sounded authentic: I recalled that serializing  stories was very common in the nineteenth century because books  were too expensive for most people. Would Amanda have known this as an eleven-year-old? The rest of Amanda’s story rang true as well; the details of her life as Elizabeth were realistic and came to her readily. And it resonated with present-day Amanda. Who , does have an uncanny facility with words.

But “flower people” – where had that come from? Amanda, down-to-earth and sophisticated, was embarrassed by this seemingly incongruous embellishment to the story. I decided it was probably a fantasy fragment. Norman Inge (Hypnotherapist)  had taught me that fragments of fantasy, or present-life experience, sometimes seep into the stream of past life recall because, as he explained, past life recall is filtered through the subconscious mind, the repository of all stored memory from this and other lives. It is not leakproof. But, he warned, don’t let one inconsistency throw you , into thinking the whole thing is fantasy if the rest seems true.  Evaluate the story as a whole. With Amanda, the rest  the story,  felt and sounded genuine, so I accepted it as true, not wanting to throw out the baby with the bathwater.

Later, that year Amanda won a writing contest in her school.  When I congratulated her, I said. “See. you do have this talent  from the past, don’t you.” Amanda just rolled her eyes at me and laughed nervously. She still wasn’t sure about the regression, especially the “flower people.”  

Amanda and her family moved out of state the next year. She and Sarah (Carol Bowman’s daughter) stayed in touch, visiting each other during school vacations. This gave me the opportunity to follow her progress as a writer. She said she wrote short stories and poetry all the time and had joined the literary magazine at school. She admitted to me once that she still pondered her memory of Elizabeth, the writer in her past.

Almost five years after her regression, Amanda wrote to me with a most unusual epilogue:

“One of the strangest incidents happened to me about a year  ago on my vacation in England. I had never been to England before. When my parents and I got off the plane at London airport, we got a cab to our hotel. Our cab driver was extremely talkative and was willing to talk about anything. As we passed the first street of townhouses, my mother commented on all of the flower gardens. The driver told us that almost everyone in London had a garden. He said that Londoners used gardening as a way to escape from the pressures of their lives and that he, and, other people he knew, liked to talk to the flower people in their gardens. My jaw dropped. And my eyes nearly popped out of my head when heard that. Flower people, I thought. What a coincidence”.